Thursday, May 21, 2009

Whom can I trust?

I've had some recent circumstances in my life that have weighed heavily on my mind. I could talk about them here in this post, but that would mean exposing my emotions to the World Wide Web, all over the internet, for anyone to read. That's a pretty scary prospect, so I'll think twice before I share.

Why? Why won't I talk about personal matters on the web? Well, for one thing - the main thing - I don't trust my secrets with just anyone. I have to trust you first.

Now, I know that some of you reading this know me pretty well and have known me for many, many years. Some of you who follow my blog or are reading this Facebook may know me from over 20 years or so ago. Some of you hardly know me, if at all. To share with one of you in this format is to share with all of you.

We're all adults. Can I rely on you to keep what's told to you in confidence, or will you go to a mutual friend that I haven't shared with because he violated my trust in the past? Do you really think that I'd want to risk being hurt in that way again?

Many of us have had similar circumstances and have our own advice to share. If I share, will you tell me how to fix my problem right away, or can I trust that you will hear me out, probing me to go deeper to the root of the problem, before you walk with me through the valley? If you do offer to walk with me, how do I know you won't flake out?

If I do trust you, it means that you tell the truth in love, without sugar-coating what needs to be told. You keep your promises. Honesty is one of your core values. Integrity is your middle name. If you say you'll do something, you do it. This is how you are not just with me, but with everyone in your life.

I'm not naive. I know that any man or woman who I put my trust in to any degree will eventually let me down, as I will ultimately let down each and everyone who places their trust in me. To those who have failed me, I offer forgiveness. To those I have let down, I ask that you extend forgiveness in kind. For those whom I continue to trust, and you know who you are, I deeply thank you. I would be a different person without you in my life. I love you for that.

For those who are not yet one of my most trusted confidants, perhaps someday you will be. I pray that you have someone in your life that you trust in that way.

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